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Marie Claire
Dating Advice: 9 First-Date Mistakes

Avoid these errors to improve your chances of making a good initial impression

By dating blogger Rich Santos for Marie Claire Updated: May 22, 2009
Dating singles on their first date
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Singles, the best thing about bad dates is that we walk away with a great story, and little doubt that the perpetrator is not the person for us.
I thought about some of the widespread errors made on first dates and came up with nine common mistakes that could kill the chances for a second date:
More Dating Articles from Marie Claire:Dating Mistake #1: Arriving Late
Even five minutes of lateness is inexcusable on the first date. People are already anxious on these excursions, so making someone wait is pretty rude. It seems like the trend in NYC is to be late for things regularly.
On one date, I texted the girl and told her I was running late. She said she was too. We ended up just having the date a half-hour later than planned; and technically, no one was late because we were both a half-hour late together.
Dating Mistake #2: Wardrobe Malfunction
Make sure you cater what you wear to what you're doing. I try not to make a girl walk too much if she's in heels. Also, I've seen girls wear pearls and a nice blouse to trashy outdoor events, or heels to sporting events -- not a good idea.
Dating Mistake #3: Talking Politics or Religion
Staying away from debatable content is a good idea the first time out. It's fun to argue with your significant other, but I think it's important to reach a comfort level first. If you try to proselytize someone, or battle them over a hot topic, you may reach a point of no return.
Dating Mistake #4: Checking Out Other People
You'd think that no one would do this, but guys are always looking at waitresses, or other patrons when out. My one friend got in hot water because his date told me he made cat calls at other girls while on a date. Talk about a mistake!
Dating Mistake #5: Bringing Friends (Non-Group Date)
If you bring friends along, you look immature and insecure. You also throw the other person for a loop if they were expecting the date to be one-on-one. Make sure you establish that it is a one-on-one date, and follow the rules and show up alone.
Dating Mistake #6: Being Too Aggressive
No one wants to deal with someone's wandering hands before they are ready. It is one of the best ways to creep someone out. Just because someone is getting dinner with someone once doesn't mean it's an invitation for physical affection. It's best to be hands-off on the first date.
Dating Mistake #7: Being Too Unaggressive
My friend Margaret warns me to be more aggressive all the time. She said that if I don't kiss someone at the end of a date or make a move when they snuggle with me, they will begin to think something's wrong with them -- or that I'm not into them. Maybe that's true, but sometimes I am just being too safe so that I don't break the rule I just mentioned above.
Dating Mistake #8: Canceling at The Last Minute or Standing Someone Up
Canceling for a legitimate reason is fine, but respect your date's time so that they can plan their night without you. Canceling one hour before a date is not cool -- most of the date prep has already started at this point. Standing someone up is so rude. What does it accomplish? If you change your mind, at least have the strength to just cancel. No need to make someone feel bad and waste their time just because you're too chicken to cancel the date.
Dating Mistake #9: Dominating the Conversation
Try to breathe in between sentences, and don't talk too much. Give your date a chance to talk. Aren't you trying to get to know one another? And don't speak for that other person (i.e. order for them at dinner) unless they invite you to help with their order.
Reprinted with permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.More Marie Claire:
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