Online Dating Story: "It was a match made in heaven."
By Jennifer H., 33, San Diego, CA
Updated: Nov 11, 2009
I
married my high school sweetheart in New Jersey and the military
brought us to San Diego. I was a military wife for 10 years, then
suddenly my husband called it quits. He said he didn't want to be
married anymore. It was extremely shocking.
After
the unexpected divorce and being left with two children (ages 2 and 4),
I never thought I'd fall in love again. My heart was broken. Here I
was, 33 years old with a child still in diapers, no family nearby to
help, and working extra hard to pay the bills. At night when the kids
were all tucked in, I decided to try
online dating. I
didn't expect much since my profile included the fact that I had kids.
Friends had mentioned Match.com, but the guys I met there just wanted
to date; they weren't serious about a long-term relationship. I also
tried eHarmony -- I figured all those questions would lead me to my
perfect match, but they let me down too. Then I said, what the heck,
I'll try Yahoo! Personals.
After just
a few days, I saw that Dave had peeked at my profile. I checked his
profile and thought he was handsome. He had something special about the
depth of his eyes. I saw someone so genuine and sincere. I thought, I
gotta email this guy! To my surprise, he wrote back. We emailed for a
week, then talked on the phone. We were both burned out on dating. I
agreed to meet him for a date, on one condition -- that we refer to it
as a "non-date."
Our First Non-DateWe
went to have a drink at sunset. It was like we were old friends
catching up over the years. Then we went to Sunset Cliff and sat
looking over the ocean and talked all through the sunset. We talked
about families, careers, religion, our dreams for the future. I thought
this guy's great, but I was so jaded from previous dates that I held
back, I wanted to see more. (Dave later told me that he knew I was the
one when he first saw me!)
From then
on, Dave and I were together all the time. Within a month, he met my
kids and the mutual response was amazing! He doesn't have any kids and
always wanted some. We were having a wonderful time, but at the end of
every date I wanted to take it slow. Dave didn't know what to think of
that and he'd ask the women he worked with, "What does this girl want?"
I knew we had something special, but my heart was still not whole after
the past 1 1/2 years of trying to conquer my feelings from the divorce.
I thought, if it's meant to be, he'll understand. He'll stick it
out.
What was the turning point for me?
Once I saw him with my kids, I knew it felt good and comfortable. He
listened to them, he took their feelings into consideration. He was
there for them, but he didn't overstep his boundaries -- I was still
the parent. That wowed me. One day we were all together at an amusement
park and I saw him turn into a little kid with my kids -- riding
go-carts, eating candy -- and I just knew. I couldn't believe the good
connection we had, and then on top of that he wants to be part of my
family! It was a match made in heaven.
Proposal at the BeachDave
was the first guy I met on Yahoo! Personals. We met in August 2007, and
in June 2008 he proposed to me. It was a total surprise. He had already
spoken to his mom and asked if he could have the family diamond ring.
We were on a regular date, walking on the beach. We sat down on a rock
and he told me how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, he
couldn't wait. It was a mix of total shock and happiness for me. I knew
I wanted to marry him, but I didn't know it would happen this fast. I
said, "Yes!"
We are planning a May '09
wedding at Sunset Cliff, the same spot where we had our first
"non-date." We're going to keep it small and the kids will be a big
part of it. Dave said he's marrying the whole package!
Online Dating Tips From Jennifer1.
For your first meeting, make sure you meet in a neutral environment and
public place. Keep it brief, such as meeting for
coffee rather than dinner.
2.
Open your mind to what your ideal match is. I
originally thought height was a big factor for me -- I wanted a guy who
was at least X" tall. But in the end, it wasn't so important. Loosen up
your requirements and you might meet the perfect mate.
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